According to the definition of abortion contained in a new proposal -- "any of the various procedures -- including the prescription, dispensing and administration of any drug or the performance of any procedure or any other action -- that results in the termination of the life of a human being in utero between conception and natural birth, whether before or after implantation" -- birth control pills would be considered abortion.

The proposal, still in draft form only, is intended to prevent any organization that receives funding from the Department of Health and Human Services -- including hospitals, clinics, and medical schools -- from refusing to hire doctors that are unwilling to perform abortions or provide contraception, even when that is part of the job. Mary Jane Gallagher, who heads the National Family Planning and Reproductive Health Association, worries "that under the proposal, contraceptive services would become less available to low-income and uninsured women."

Naturally, there is a lot of outcry over the proposal. Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi says that, if enacted, the proposal "will launch a dangerous assault on women's health." While I don't think the new and expanded definition of abortion would include abstinence as some have joked, I do think it is pretty ridiculous.

Source

Do you like baseball? Any kind of sport? What about traveling or other activities? If you said yes to any of the above, do you enjoy doing so with your spouse? A new report from a set of studies, some of which have been going on for more than a decade, seems to think that if you do, your marriage has more of a chance at surviving. You know the old saying "those that play together stay together?" Well, turns out there may be something to that after all. Howard Markman, co-director of the University of Denver's Center for Marital and Family Studies, believes that having fun with your spouse is essential to your marriage.

Seems like a no brainer, sure, but when was the last time you went on a date with your spouse? That's one of the questions asked of couples by Markman and Scott Stanley, the other co-director of the study. The results were interesting, especially when they found out that women and men have very different views on what constitutes a date. The last time you spent time with your spouse could seem forever ago due to the economy, raising kids, demanding careers and commutes, among other things. Still, I think any married couple will tell you it's critical to have fun in your shared lives if you want to get something meaningful out of your time together.

According to another study, marital interaction is actually on the decline. Paul Amato, a sociologist at the Pennsylvania State University, surveyed over 2000 couples in 1980 and another set of roughly the same amount in the year 2000 and found that the number of couples who consistently participated in leisure activities together declined. The good news? Markman, in a separate study, noted that cities with major league baseball teams had a divorce rate 28% less than cities who wanted one but didn't have one. Why? Well, it certainly gives married couples something to do! No comment on whether or not the couples were happier if their teams won the pennant.

Source

Actor, comedian and some-time eyedrop commercial maker Ben Stein, who once offered America the chance to win his money, has written a funny and telling article over at the New York Times. Most of us know by now the man who is most famous for asking over and over again, "Bueller?" is an economics genius, but did you hear what he has to say about love? Well, according to Mr. Stein, there is an economics to love, too.

Take for example what he says about junk bonds: "High-quality bonds consistently yield more return than junk, and so it is with high-quality love." I think we can all agree we've had that junk bond love experience and Ben perhaps knows what he's talking about. They're great for the short term, but they won't--and don't--last. Stein likens this to dating someone with a ton of problems and thinking you can change that person. Of course, he also notes that it's impossible to do that unless you control the market.

Stein also said something that is sure to stick, at least with me. That is that one should "fall in love in haste and depart at leisure." This means that once you've found a winner, whether in love or in a stock, that you stick with it. Commitment is everything, as is nurturing. This is true of love of and for adults, but I would bet the same is true of parenting. Fall in love with your spouse, fall in love with your children, and do everything you can to stay in love with them. Good advice? I'd say so--and take that payout to the bank.

Source

Actor Kevin Costner recently revealed his fear of fatherhood almost cost him his marriage. The Tin Cup star, already father to three children, was unsure of his ability to be an effective father to the children new girlfriend (now wife) Christine Baumgartner.

Christine made no bones about her desire to be a mother, and Costner admits it kept him from marrying her for years. Then the actor made a stark realization: lose a gorgeous young woman who wants to spend the rest of her life with you, or have another kid.

The pair wed in 2004 and Christine gave birth to the couple's first child, son Cayden, in 2007. I can appreciate Christine's candor--so many couples fail to discuss the crucial element of children before they get married. Either you want them, or you don't--and it's best to make that clear before you take a trip down the aisle. Looks like Christine got to have her cake and eat it too.

Source

Minnie Driver may want to give Bridget Moynahan a call. Ms. Moynahan has experience in something Minnie thinks she may be taking on pretty soon: single motherhood. The actress, who is expecting any day now, says she isn't certain whether or not she'll stay with the baby's father and is considering single motherhood as a definite option. Minnie has even set the stage for the possibility of a man-free world by surrounding herself with family and friends to help rear the baby.

According to the actress she'll have her mother, aunt and best friends to support her. Minnie has still refused to let on who the father of the baby is. She is also quoted as saying it's great to be independent in that way--and she certainly already has a leg up on that by denying the Hollywood gossip rags info on the baby daddy! Way to go, Minnie!

Minnie has also stated she'll probably go for a regular old baby name instead of some type of fruit, a day of the week or something that belongs on a space station. We'll see about that--she's resisted telling us the baby's daddy, the sex and now she wants a normal name? Who is this person who does whatever she wants? Independent indeed!

Source

Jessica Alba recently came clean about what it really felt like to be pregnant. The sexy Latina star, known for vamping it up in such films as Sin City and the recent The Love Guru, said that she loved being pregnant and wouldn't trade the experience for the world, but that it left her feeling less than desirable in the hotness department.

Unlike Catherine Zeta Jones, who claimed she never felt sexier than when she was pregnant, it seems like Alba just felt fat. Says the star, "I wanted to get rid of all that weight." Alba recently became mom to Honor Marie (as well as Mrs. Cash Warren).

Many women feel gorgeous rather than gross during their pregnancies. Others feel blobby, but only post-partum. What about you? Did you bask in the glorious glow of impending motherhood or did you feel less sexy than ever?

Source

There are reasons that parents don't let their kids date before a certain age, and maturity is one of them. Preteens are often not ready to handle the strong feelings that come with a romantic relationship. They also might not recognize when a good relationship has turned bad.

Liz Claiborne and Loveisrespect.org recently sponsored a survey of tweens and young teens, looking for insight into what goes on in these young relationships. The results were alarming. Here's a glimpse:

• One out of five 13 and 14-year-olds responded that they knew a friend who was physically abused by a boyfriend or girlfriend. Half said that they know someone who was verbally abused.
• Nine percent of 11 to 12-year-olds say that their friends have sex.
• Nearly 70% of kids who have sex before they turn 14 experience some kind of abuse.
• Half of all tweens who responded didn't know the warning signs of an abusive relationship.
• Significant numbers of tweens and teens experienced abuse through the use of technology (IMing, texting, etc).

Source

At four years old, my daughter knows what a penis is and (more or less) that it's something that boys have. After all, she has two brothers and a dad, so it's not like she hasn't seen one before. According to the Brook Advisory Centres and the Family Planning Association, two British non-profits that focus on sexual health and education, she's off to a good start.

The two organizations are calling for mandatory Sex and Relationships Education, beginning as young as four years old. Brook's CEO, Simon Blake, said that "If we get high quality sex and relationships education in every primary and secondary school across the UK, all the evidence shows teenage pregnancy rates will continue to fall and will improve young people's sexual health."

"Young people will find information and if we don't give it to them in a responsible way, they'll find it from elsewhere," notes Julie Bentley, CEO of the FPA. "Pornography is a good example... what it does is it distorts their understanding about sex." The organizations want to make sure that kids get adequate and accurate information about both the emotional and practical aspects of sex, in part to help stop the rising numbers of cases of sexually transmitted diseases and teenage abortions.

Naturally, there are parents who don't like the idea. "I wouldn't be discussing it with my children at that age so I wouldn't want the school to be doing it," says one mother of a six-year-old and a one-year-old. I don't know -- I know my daughter is aware that boys are different from girls and I certainly don't want her to grow up believing myths such as "you can't get pregnant the first time." I want her to have good information and if the schools can work with experts to develop an age-appropriate curriculum, that seems like a good idea to me.

Source

I've heard of a lot of reasons why people avoid "Old McDodald's", as the famous fast food chain is known around our house -- the general unhealthiness of the food, the destruction of the rainforests, their marketing through school notices, and so on -- but the American Family Association has come up with a new one.

The AFA is calling for a boycott of the golden arches because the company is "promoting the homosexual agenda, including homosexual marriage." According to AFA founder and chairman Rev. Don Wildmon, McDonald's is "promoting a lifestyle that would utterly destroy the traditional family." He's right, of course -- now that my neighbors are allowed to get married, my wife and I are required to get a divorce and I have to shack up with a guy.

McDonald's has said in the past that it is "a company that actively demonstrates its commitment to the gay and lesbian community" -- I guess for some, that's a reason to boycott them; for me, it's a reason to support them.

Source

According to the rumor mill, which has been churning for a while now on this one, actress Naomi Watts is pregnant with her second child. The Aussie is allegedly four months along.

Watts is married to fellow actor Liev Schreiber, with whom she has son Alexander, who will turn one this July. Watts' best friend, Nicole Kidman, is due this year as well, just a few months before Naomi, if the rumors are true. Hey, no time like the present to get moving with making your family. Have all the kids now and then get back to your original shape and all that movie-making business, eh?

Good luck and congratulations to Naomi and Liev!

Source

Hey, remember Molly Ringwald? Well, she's back, and in more ways than one. The former teen star, memorable for such culture- and era-designing movies such as Sixteen Candles and The Breakfast Club, is now starring in a television drama about teens. This time, however, the forty-year-old is playing mom to one of them.

And that teen happens to be pregnant. You may recall Molly is no stranger to the teen pregnancy plot. She played a pregnant teen in the movie For Keeps. Perhaps she'll be drawing from that experience for her latest project. Another project Molly has going for her is motherhood, so this role should be an easy one (as if being a mother, even playing one, was EVER easy!).

According to Molly, the key between moms and teen daughters is really communication. Her hope is to spread that message and curtail as many unplanned pregnancies as possible. The movie is titled The Secret Life of the American Teenager as is set to debut July 1st.

Source

When I was single, online matchmaking was pretty much unheard of. There were a few sites where you might hook up with another person (anyone remember Prodigy.com?), but chances were good that person wasn't actually single. Or employed. Or remotely attractive. Things have come a long way since then and online matchmaking is quite popular and for some, very successful. And now, online dating has taken the next, logical step: online marriage counseling.

Created by Les and Leslie Parrot, the same people who brought you eHarmony.com, eHarmony Marriage is a computerized program promising to help couples communicate better, rekindle romance, and resolve conflicts more compassionately. Leslie Parrott is a marriage a family therapist who says that this is the perfect solution for those who aren't quite ready for traditional counseling, but want to improve their relationship.

The program involves each partner answering an online questionnaire covering everything from finance to spirituality. The responses generate a report outlining the couple's strengths and weaknesses and a proposed marriage action plan. "It will reveal where you guys are really strong and where you will find the most benefit if you invest in this area," Parrott says.

As far as the investment, the program costs $150 and takes six to eight weeks to complete. Dr. Parrott admits that online therapy might not be the best choice for couples on the brink of divorce, but sees it as a cost-effective option for those needing to open up the lines of communication.

I tend to agree. Whether you get it from a book, a counselor's office, or online, learning to communicate better is pretty much the key to everything, right?

Source

Back in the days before Eve Ensler, the word 'vagina' was the verboten V-word. Now, it seems, there is another V-word on the horizon that people -- well, guys -- refuse to discuss, let alone think about: the vasectomy. Women have long-regarded the vasectomy as an easier, safer way toward permanent birth-control. Well, it's semi-permanent, actually, because it is a reversible procedure. Men regard it as little more than butchery. Women could get their tubes tied, the men say. Men could wear a condom, the women say. Men say that would reduce their feeling. Women say, well, tough!

But what about the vasectomy, really? Modern medicine would say it is a simpler and safer procedure than tubal ligation. It's also cheaper. There's also a new non-scalpel version on the market (my husband says don't even think of mentioning the words 'scalpel' and 'penis' in the same sentence; it turns him green). The result of unwanted pregnancy after a vasectomy is also low at 1 in 1,000.

It's also a procedure no one is really using. Why? Well, there is the obvious concern that my husband put so well. Then there are the myths that having a vasectomy reduces testosterone, etc. that still float around us like so much hot air. There's also the fear of having a needle stuck in one's weewee, which has been replaced by jet-powered anesthesia.

What about your family? Once you reached the optimal number of children (or no children!) what method of birth control did you or are you employing? Was vasectomy an option, or was it verboten?

Pic by Marshall Astor-Food Pornographer.

Source

Actress Tori Spelling recently debuted her new baby girl, Stella, to the media and the world. She also revealed that it only took one try for her to get pregnant. According to OK Magazine, Tori is quoted as saying she'd been on one type of birth control pill and was feeling nauseous, so went on a different pill prescribed by her doctor. She somehow missed a day in between though, and it was on that day she claims she became pregnant.

Spelling also said Stella was rather an accident--or, I guess, that they weren't trying to get pregnant. In my opinion, they weren't not trying to get pregnant, though, as we all know it only takes one shot to seal the deal and they knew that Tori wasn't protected when they had sex! Good for them--as my friend wisely said, another baby in the world is a wonderful thing. Little Stella is a beauty and I'm sure is making her parents unbelievably happy.

I can also confirm that you can, indeed, get pregnant the first shot. I wasn't trying either, nor was I not trying. And, bam, the first time we did it without protection, I became pregnant with my daughter. Seems like Tori and I are on the same track--we both have toddler sons, both got knocked up after one try, and both either have or will have a daughter in the very near future. Another thing we have in common? Well, Spelling says she might like to have a third child, just like me. Too bad i don't have an acting career paycheck to go with my life though!

Good luck, Tori--and congrats on beautiful Stella!

Source

Is Gwyneth Paltrow expecting again? Well, the rumor mill would have us think so. For a while now, speculation has been building that the Oscar-winner is either with child or planning to be that way a third time.

Now, it seems more likely than ever that the star, who is married to and has two children with Coldplay lead singer Chris Martin, is carrying a third proverbial bun in the oven. She was recently spotted with what is being called a fuller, more curvy figure. Now, that could mean she ate a sandwich or something--we all know how the media likes to jump all over any woman who bothers to consume anything other than iceburg lettuce.

Paltrow also recently commented to Harper's Bazaar Magazine that she is willing to go through a pregnancy a third time because the result is so amazing. She also commented that her father, the late Bruce Paltrow, regretted only having two children. Paltrow is already mom to Apple, who is four is you can believe it, and Moses, two. At least these sorts of rumors aren't as bad as the other kind that always circulate about Hollywood stars--that they're having a crisis in their marriages. You'll also recall not too long ago Paltrow commented she was interested in adopting, perhaps from Brooklyn.

Source