A new small study has found that television, even when only on as background noise, has a "small but real" affect on the way young children play. Researchers found that when playing in a room with a TV on -- they used Jeopardy, a program they thought the children would have little interest in -- children tended to stop playing and watch the TV now and then, shortening the intensity and length of their play. This finding is in conflict with former studies that found that young children don't pay attention to TV that they don't understand.
When my older daughter was only a toddler, she used to ask us to turn off the TV while she played. She said once, "It makes me watch it," meaning that she couldn't take her eyes off of the TV when it was on. It surprised me, because, like those old studies, I figured if she didn't understand it she wouldn't watch. Now we have a no-TV rule during the day, unless we're sitting down to specifically watch a program. A lot of parents really like to have television on as background noise during the day, however, to listen to as they go about their activities.
So will TV's influence on your child's play affect them long term? This study isn't broad enough to prove that, but plenty of research has gone into how TV affects children. KidsHealth does a good job of rounding up some of that research, and offers tips to parents who want to limit TV time in their home.
When it comes to describing a baby's smile, words like "addictive" and "intoxicating" are frequently used to explain the feeling those gummy rays of happiness have on exhausted parents when they finally appear on Baby's face at around 6 weeks of age.
A recent study has people marveling just how accurate those descriptors were. When new mothers were shown photographs of smiling infants, the picture of their own smiling baby triggered a surge of dopamine in their brain, the same chemical the body produces when a person uses drugs, alcohol, or nicotine.
These findings of the study may assist scientists in understanding why some mothers fail to bond with their children and lead to early treatment. Unattached parents can lead to children suffering from abuse or neglect.
There are reasons that parents don't let their kids date before a certain age, and maturity is one of them. Preteens are often not ready to handle the strong feelings that come with a romantic relationship. They also might not recognize when a good relationship has turned bad.
One out of five 13 and 14-year-olds responded that they knew a friend who was physically abused by a boyfriend or girlfriend. Half said that they know someone who was verbally abused.
Nine percent of 11 to 12-year-olds say that their friends have sex.
Nearly 70% of kids who have sex before they turn 14 experience some kind of abuse.
Half of all tweens who responded didn't know the warning signs of an abusive relationship.
Significant numbers of tweens and teens experienced abuse through the use of technology (IMing, texting, etc).
We've been taught for ages now the importance of reading to our children. From the earliest age, and even in the womb (your child can hear as soon as her ears form, even if she can't see the pictures from in the womb), parents are being instructed to read to their little ones.
Why? Well, it's supposed to make 'em smarter. Now, apparently, it makes them more tolerablenicer too. Just when you thought you couldn't possibly read Goodnight Moon ONE MORE TIME comes reason to celebrate doing so. Researchers reported to The Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology that kids whose parents gave them plenty of intellectual stimulation--that's reading to them, talking to them, etc.--during their first year of life were less likely to have behavior issues such as bullying and disobeying their parents. The study was conducted on 1,863 U.S. children and their mothers (but not their fathers, oddly enough).
Naturally, that theory only goes so far. The temperament of the child during her infant stage also plays a large part in determining how she'll be later. The actual article, however, deflects back onto the parenting skills and makes a case for giving parents the skills they need to do the job right.
Many of you may remember the television show Arrested Development. While critically acclaimed it didn't get much viewership, despite being very funny and witty. Perhaps it was because the show centered around yet another dysfunctional family, this one set in affluent California. Many, however, possibly a little too much, related to the crazy antics of the family and were sad to see them go when the show was canceled after three seasons.
Now, the stars of the show have another chance to reclaim some glory as Arrested Develoment becomes a movie, like many shows before it--the Simpsons comes to mind; while Homer and Bart put the "D" in dysfunctional, their show wasn't canceled. Jeffrey Tambor, who plays the imprisoned (and escapee) patriarch of the Bluth family, is especially excited to be rejoining his fellow castmates on the big screen, which includes Jason Bateman (on whom I've had a crush since I was a kid) and Portia De Rossi.
Are you looking forward to the Arrested Development movie? Are the Bluths your favorite dysfunctional tv family, or are the Simpsons more your speed?
We all know the perils of kids and computers -- I don't mean that whole thing about how sexual predators find kids online, I'm talking about things like kids buying term papers on the web or skipping actual research for school projects by deferring to the not-always-accurate entries at Wikipedia. The Internet is an incredibly useful way to connect with people and find information, but new research is showing that too much web surfing may be changing the way our brains work.
In a long essay in the current issue of The Atlantic Monthly, Nicholas Carr looks at how Google is making us stupid. He talks about a phenomena that is familiar to many of us who spend long hours online: we've lost our ability to read, to lose ourselves in text. "My mind now expects to take in information the way the Net distributes it: in a swiftly moving stream of particles. Once I was a scuba diver in the sea of words. Now I zip along the surface like a guy on a Jet Ski."
Scientists and theorists are looking at how this kind of virtual jet skiing is changing our brains, moving us from readers who follow the sense of long, complex sentences to decoders who "power browse" for information only. Because our brains -- even our adult brains -- are plastic and malleable, this constant skimming may be rewiring the way we think.
As parents, it seems important that we are aware of this, for a couple of reasons. We all know how important it is to read to our pre-literate kids, but once they are old enough to read on their own we may slack off. But the new findings about the Internet and reading offer one more reason to push traditional books on our kids -- and on ourselves as well. Because while it's easy to skim a blog post for information, there is great value in real books, with long sentences and complex ideas. We just need to keep our brains in shape for that kind of reading.
Time Magazine recently interviewed an editor-at-large from popular magazine Psychology Today. The topic? Children, and whether or not we're turning our kids into wimps. Hara Estroff Marano, the interviewee, had much to say on the subject of children, and how we raise them. Marano, who is also a grandmother and author of a new book titled A Nation of Wimps: The High Cost of Invasive Parenting, says we are turning our kids into wimps. She says we need to let our kids have bad experiences as it's the only way they learn.
Marano pointed out her research on the college campus, noting that her colleagues commented that many of the students they were treating lacked coping skills. Says Marano, "...they have no idea how to manage the vicissitudes of life." Why has this happened? Well, according to Marano we're worried about our kids being successful. We push them too hard to achieve, and we worry more about branding than experience, focusing on sending them to the best schools, etc., when perhaps the brand name of Harvard or Yale is not what they need. Access to information through the Internet makes everything fleeting and transitional and ultimately obsolete before we can even understand it fully.
Marano also argues, along with much of our nation, that our children are being over-medicated and that play time is not valued as it should be. And, shocker, she feels we're too involved in every aspect of our children's lives. So how to deal? Well, according to Marano, we need to step back, let kids prove their competence, let them play, and make sure we eat together five times a week. I don't know if doing these things will save our kids from being wimps, or if they're wimps in the first place, but she does provide an interesting perspective.
Your thoughts? Do you think we overprotect our children and undervalue their ability? Or is that what it takes to get through this crazy modern world?
When I think of the hottest trends in hip teen clothing, I usually think of that store in the mall that has the half naked mannequins lounging around out front. What I don't think of is JCPenney. But apparently, that's exactly the direction that the national chain is trying to head in. Just take a look at their latest teen-centric ad:
JCPenney's has jumped onto the "sex sells" bandwagon, trying to update their image to attract a younger crowd. But here's what I'm wondering: The commercial clearly pokes fun at the trusting mom who sits upstairs reading her magazine while the kids "go downstairs to watch TV." At the same time, it's sending a message to teen customers that today is the day to have sex with your boyfriend, right under your mom's nose.
The thing is, that mom in the commercial likely makes up the majority of JCPenney's customer base. How are moms who are loyal to this classic and formerly pretty wholesome brand going to feel about this commercial that encourages their teens to break parental rules and engage in risky behavior? Betrayed? Angry? Suddenly not so spendy?
It seems like a big risk to take to me. What do you think about JCPenney's new commercial?
Edited to add: As it turns out, everyone, JCPenney did not authorize this ad. (Let's let out a collective whew.) There's a lot of finger pointing going on right now; JCPenney is blaming its ad company Saatchi & Saatchi, who in turn is blaming the production company Epoch films.
According to Gawker, the commercial won an award at the Cannes Lions Awards this past weekend. Penney's chief marketing officer has been quoted as saying, "It's obviously inappropriate and nothing we would ever condone."
As Disney shows such as Hannah Montana and High School Musical (HSM) predictably make their way down the marketing food chain, there is growing concern among parents that adolescent themes like boyfriends and break-ups are now being digested by two and three-year olds. Today, it's not unusual for a four year-old to have a High School Musical birthday party or to proclaim Sharpay, HSM's superficial, Jimmy Choo wearing mean girl to be her "favorite character." So long Cinderella.
I have sounded off on this disturbing trend often in my blogs and I stand by my position that the sexualization of childhood via entertainment, toys, and clothes is one of the most insidious forces facing young kids -- especially young girls.
It's not easy to safeguard childhood given the corporate marketing onslaught and the fact that so many kids are steeped in what now passes for "kid culture."
So what's a mom to do? My strategy is to stick to my guns. If I can postpone a premature adolescence by even a couple of years, it will be worth it. I set age-appropriate boundaries and explain them in a way that my children can understand and explain to their peers if questioned about it.
Of course, they want to know why their friends can watch these shows when they can't. I simply tell them that all families have different rules. This won't be the first time where ours differs from those of other families. In our home, I explain, kids watch and play with kid stuff because being a kid is FUN and there is no need to rush it. I assure them that there will be plenty of time for tween and teen things in the future. So far, this explanation has been satisfactory. I used a similar tact with the Bratz Dolls: "I want you to play with a doll that looks like you. This doll looks kind of mean and wears so much make-up. She doesn't look very fun."
This year our 8 year-old daughter attended a party where High School Musical was shown. She informed the girls that she isn't allowed to watch "teenager movies" and an animated G-rated film was played instead. She also left the room when the conversation turned to things she recognized that we would not like her to be part of. I didn't expect that to happen, but it did and I was proud of her. It happened to be the day before Mother's Day and I told her it was the best present she could have ever given me.
This weekend, she attended Girl Scout camp by herself for the first time. Initially, I had flashbacks of all those "camp" movies where the bad girls talk the other girls into compromising dares and rites of initiation involving boys. Luckily, camp came on the heels of her very commendable (and courageous) conduct at the birthday party. I let her go.
As the bus drove off, I thought to myself, "First Girl Scouts, then college." It goes so fast. That's precisely why she should be a little girl as long as she can.
Names can be a tricky thing; expecting parents agonize over choosing just the right name for their new bundle of joy. But the name dilemma isn't over once you bring the baby home -- sure, you've named the BABY, but now the renaming of the parents begins. I don't mean the choice between being Mommy or Mama or Mamacita -- I mean the much more sensitive issue of what your children's friends, and your friends' children, will call call you.
The basic name dilemma is first name versus last -- are you Jane or Mrs. Smith to the tots in your playgroup? And then there's the more complicated last name issue -- what if your last name and your child's last name aren't the same? Are you Mrs. Child's Last Name or Mrs. Your Last Name?
And why does it matter?
New York Times etiquette expert Philip Galanes thinks it shouldn't; in response to a query about a friend who insists that children call adults Mrs. Child's Last Name, rather than using the mother's actual last name, because that's the "proper" thing to do, he says, "Next time you meet one of your friend's children - preferably with his Stepford mother in tow - insist he call you Jules, J-Bird or another nickname that's as inappropriate for a 9-year-old to use as you can bear to suggest. It may take a village to raise a child, but it takes just one sensible adult to bring down a regime that calls people by the wrong names for the sake of 'proper manners.'"
I disagree with Galanes. I think any parent who is encouraging her child to address adults in a respectful manner is doing them a favor. We constantly hear about parents who are NOT teaching good manners -- why attack the parent who is? And why encourage inappropriate behavior as a response?
What do your kids call the other grown ups? Do you ask other parents how they want to be addressed, or just go with the Mr. and Mrs. Child's Last Name shorthand?
When my second daughter was born, parenting was physically grueling but not much of a mental game. As long as everyone was fed, dry, and well-rested, our days ran pretty smoothly. But now that they're older, I'm finding myself having to actually parent. Linda recently talked about this very phenomenon. It's one thing to take care of kids, it's another to raise them to be responsible, thoughtful human beings.
A very large component of parenting children is discipline, and there's no shortage of experts out there telling us how to do it (or telling us how we're doing it wrong). But according to a recent article from U.S. News & World Report, researchers have actual scientific evidence that certain parenting techniques work better than others, and they too are willing to tell us what we're doing wrong. Only this time, they've got good advice.
Finally, after all this time, Nicole Kidman and I have something in common. The Oscar-winning actress is set to become a mom this year, and like me, she cried at her ultrasound. Sound silly, but it's true--an ultrasound can be one of those moments in life where everything--everything--changes.
Says Kidman, who feared at one point she would never bear a child, "To feel life growing with you is something very, very special, and I'm going to embrace that completely." Kidman went on to say, in an interview to Vogue Magazine, that you either walk through life and experience it or are a voyeur, and she's not a voyeur. I'm not 100% clear on what she meant but that, but frankly having an ultrasound does make one a bit of a voyeur! Your little unborn baby has no idea you're watching him or her do his or her thing in the womb.
Still, to see who it is that's giving you all those kicks, and that gas--well, it's nothing short of a miracle. I laugh now, but every time I even hear the heartbeat, which is about once a month, I get all weepy. There is nothing more beautiful than the sound of your child's heartbeat. Good luck to Nicole and Keith Urban as they wander through this glorious experience that is carrying and birthing a child. If she's like this now, just wait until she gets one of those 4-D ultrasounds!
Every child is unique, it's true. Some, however, are a little more unique than others. There was Lakshmi, who was born with four arms and four legs. And now there's the son of Chinese farmer Li Jun of Hejian city located in the central Chinese province of Henan. The boy was destined to be twice the man I am -- he was born with two penises.
Yep, you read that right -- the boy had an extra bit of manhood smack dab in the middle of his back. While I'm not sure that's the spot I'd pick for a little extra equipment, it would certainly make for some interesting conversations down at the local swimming hole. The abnormal growth was apparently a case of fetus in fetu, a condition where a fetus develops inside or as part of its twin.
Doctors spent more than three hours in surgery removing the extra penis and say he is doing fine. I'm not so sure of that, however. You think the anti-circumcision guys are angry; when he grows up, this kid is gonna be pissed!
At birth, the baby's blood alcohol level was 0.29, a level she should not even be close to attaining until well into her college years. The drunk mother could face up to five years in prison because of the celebration (or self-medication, whichever the case might be) for child endangerment.
I've known several people who drank before they even knew they were pregnant and the guilt over possibly harming the development of fetus they didn't realize was there was crushing. I can't imagine purposely getting drunk knowing full well that the baby is partaking everything you are.
Doctors say so far the baby appears fine and I hope for the child's sake she suffers no ill effects from her mother's poor judgment.
With school-free, summer days looming ahead, many parents will soon be hearing the familiar refrain, "I'm bored!" from the kids. But before you start scrambling around to organize yet another day of amazing kid activities, check out this eye-opening article from Lifehack that reminds us that boredom isn't lethal, it's actually a good thing.
Boredom is often the trigger behind creative ideas and introspection to leads to deeper thoughts. Having time where the mind is free to wander is an luxury that few people, especially children are allowed anymore. From birth, products now come with built in entertainment. Mobiles are now standard for Pack N Plays and baby swings, and vibrating, musical, light-show playing gewgaws are also commonplace. When babies get a little bigger, there are DVD players to keep them occupied during road trips, handheld gaming devices, and television and video games to fill the free time spaces for children at home.
Instead of trying to provide a constant stream of activity, help acclimate your child to periods of boredom. See what sorts of creations and games they can come up with using only rudimentary materials like sticks and leaves and rocks. Declare entire days electronic-device free and see what happens when kids are left to their own devices for a while.
And instead of feeling like a failure when the kids say, "I'm bored!" be proud that you are providing a valuable gift that will help them be healthy and successful adults.
A new small study has found that television, even when only on as background noise, has a "small but real" affect on the way young children play. Researchers found that when playing in a room with a TV on -- they used Jeopardy, a program they thought the children would have little interest in -- children tended to stop playing and watch the TV now and then, shortening the intensity and length of their play. This finding is in conflict with former studies that found that young children don't pay attention to TV that they don't understand.
When it comes to describing a baby's smile, words like "addictive" and "intoxicating" are frequently used to explain the feeling those gummy rays of happiness have on exhausted parents when they finally appear on Baby's face at around 6 weeks of age. 
We all know the perils of kids and computers -- I don't mean that whole thing about how sexual predators find kids online, I'm talking about things like kids buying term papers on the web or skipping actual research for school projects by deferring to the not-always-accurate entries at Wikipedia. The Internet is an incredibly useful way to connect with people and find information, but new research is showing that too much web surfing may be changing the way our brains work.
Names can be a tricky thing; expecting parents agonize over choosing just the right name for their new bundle of joy. But the name dilemma isn't over once you bring the baby home -- sure, you've named the BABY, but now the renaming of the parents begins. I don't mean the choice between being Mommy or Mama or Mamacita -- I mean the much more sensitive issue of what your children's friends, and your friends' children, will call call you.
Every child is unique, it's true. Some, however, are a little more unique than others. There was 
There are few greater causes for celebration than a brand new baby, but one Polish mother started her celebrating a bit early, 
With school-free, summer days looming ahead, many parents will soon be hearing the familiar refrain, "I'm bored!" from the kids. But before you start scrambling around to organize yet another day of amazing kid activities, check out this 
