Making the choice to adopt requires a big commitment. You really have to be prepared and know what you're getting into. It's not something that can happen by accident or in the heat of the moment. In New York, you can even get certified as "Qualified Adoptive Parents" by the New York City Surrogate Court. That's what Rosario Gennaro and Alexander Gardner did.

When they went online to register with ParentProfiles.com, a website that lists prospective adoptive parents' information, however, they ran into an unforeseen obstacle -- discrimination. You see, Adoption Profiles, LLC, the company that runs the website, limits profiles to "Qualifying Husband and Wife Couples".

The same company chose to stop doing business in California rather than take on the state's antidiscrimination laws after being sued in 2004. Now they may have to give up New York as well -- Lambda Legal, a national, non-profit, civil rights organization, has filed, on behalf of Gennaro and Gardner, a discrimination complaint with the New York attorney general's office.

It's a shame that someone would let their prejudice get in the way of finding a loving home for a child that needs one. "We are committed partners who can provide a loving home for the child," says Gennaro. It's too bad that Adoption Profiles won't let a child into that loving home.

If you thought fake babies were a weird substitute for having actual children, what do you think about monkeys? As in primates? As in monkids? Apparently, adopting capuchin monkeys and treating them just like a human member of the family is all the rage among some folks. Empty-nesters and those who can't or don't want to have actual children are shelling out big bucks for monkeys who will take their place in the family as babies who never grow up.

Lori Johnson adopted her capuchin, Jessy, because she was lonely after her children grew up and left home. Depressed, she decided that what would cheer her up would be to rip a baby monkey from its mother and dress it up in baby clothes and treat it like her own child. When Jessy became a little aggressive, Lori had the monkey's teeth removed. That solved the problem and now they are a happy little family, sharing the dinner table and even the bed. "I couldn't imagine not having her," Lori says. "We do something all the time with her."

Not all monkid stories have a happily-ever-after. Kari Bagnall, who runs a sanctuary for monkeys whose human parents could no longer care for them, sees first-hand the dark side of adopting wild animals as pets or surrogate children. "I have monkeys here that the people have had for 20 years. Never had a problem," Bagnall says. "Twenty years later, the monkey attacks. So it's just something, it's going to happen. It's not a matter of, you know, if they're going to attack. It's when."

I don't doubt that Lori Johnson, and the estimated 15,000 like her in the United States, truly love their little monkey children. And I can even see the appeal in adopting a creature that will forever remain infantile and cute. But I think it is the height of selfishness to take an intelligent creature away from its natural mother and habitat because it makes you happy.

Every state in the union now has a safe haven law, allowing a parent to leave a baby with specified people or organizations instead of abandoning or injuring the child. I think this is a good thing -- if someone finds themselves with a baby they are unable to care for, I would much rather see that baby dropped off at a hospital, firehouse, or police station than have it dumped in a trash can or left in the woods.

I have no idea what it would be like to have to surrender one's child, but I do have some insight into what it is like to be on the other end of the process. I came across this piece written by a college student who was working at a hospital when a young woman brought in her baby. It's an interesting look at a side of the process we don't usually think about -- those who take these children in are affected too.

I wish that we had absolutely no need for these laws, but until that happens, I'm glad there are people like this young man who can help these infants with compassion and caring.

In a recent New York Times article, the pain associated with not being able to have a child is likened to that of a back ache--dull, aching, and never quite goes away. For some women, the miracle of child birth and the joy of raising a child will always be unattainable--because of infertility, because of timing or age, or for unknown reasons.

Some of these women (and their partners) adopt. Some, like Pamela Mahoney, who was interviewed for the article, make the tough decision to move on. Many of them do this after countless hours and thousands of dollars spent on treatments, analysis and IVF. They decide to remain childless.

The question that keeps ringing in the back of my head is why not adopt? There are so many children out there who need loving homes, the kind that surely these couples would be able to offer. As one woman commented in the article, adoption isn't an easy answer. She'd seen the struggles of her friends who went through the adoption process. I've seen it to--some meet with success, others not so much. It's just as heartbreaking.

Willie Garson, the accomplished actor best know for playing Carrie Bradshaw's gay sidekick Stanford Blatch on Sex and the City, is having a momentous year. In its opening weekend, the SATC movie pummeled the competition (including box-office darling Indian Jones) to be the #1 movie of that week.

But Garson has something more exciting than professional success. He recently revealed that the adoption paperwork is nearly finished for him to become the father of a boy from Los Angeles county.

When Teleflora ran a mother's contest that categorized adoptive mothers as "Non-Moms" it incited a justifiable outrage. Of course, adoptive mothers are mothers!

Now it's Madonna, adoptive mother of David Banda, who is raising eyebrows with a statement she made regarding her adoption proceedings.

"It was painful, and it was a big struggle, and I didn't understand it," the singer/dancer/actress and mother of three told reporters in Canne.

When considering adoption, how much thought or emphasis is placed on race? Well, that may have very much to do with the family planning on doing the adopting. To the adoption agencies who are supposed to be color blind because of a federal law, however, things may be about to change. A recent report on the subject, however, claims that downplaying race during adoption--as these agencies are instructed to do--ultimately underserves the children being adopted.

The report studied a decade of material concerning children of color adopted into white households. Among the findings were that white parents were not prepared for future challenges of raising a child of a different race, and that both social workers and state agencies were afraid to even bring up the subject of race with prospective adoptive parents.

The report is strongly suggesting the federal law, known as the Multiethnic Placement Act, be changed to allow agencies receiving federal funding to consider race and culture when choosing parents for foster care. According to one interviewee, Shannon Gibney--who seems to have put it best--"...you can't just say we're all human or love will be enough." The downside of letting race play a role in adoption? In the eyes and experience of some, foster children wait longer for adoption. This is sure to be a controversial topic setting the Internet from abuzz to aflame. Your thoughts? Especially if you've adopted a child of a different race or culture, I'd love to hear about your experience. Is the law a help or a hindrance--or does it even matter?

Oh come on. We all saw Juno. Everyone knows the way you find a kid to adopt is to put an ad in the Penny Saver. Sheesh. So I guess not everyone actually saw that movie. A couple near Seattle, Washington tried a different approach recently. Noticing that their waitress was pregnant, they left their card with the tip. Along with their names and phone numbers, the card said "We wish to adopt a baby. We are a caring, happily married, financially secure and loving couple. We want to share our joy and love with a child."

For Julie Moore and her husband J.D. Ross, the card was an unpleasant surprise. "I was just shocked because they didn't say a word to me about being pregnant, ask me how my pregnancy is going or ask me if I was pregnant or anything," said Julie. "I don't wear a wedding ring at work. For them to assume I'm not married or that I'm working in a service industry that I maybe couldn't afford to have a child, I don't know, I felt there were too many assumptions there," she added.

As for her husband, he "thought it was really creepy." According to the prospective adoptive parent's lawyer, there haven't been any negative responses before, but I guess there haven't been any positive ones or they wouldn't still be looking. Perhaps they might be more successful with a less cheeky method?

A few years ago, my best friend decided to build her family through adoption. Recently, she became Mom to an amazing young boy. She's taught me so much over the last few years, both about the process but also about how how to be sensitive to adoptive parents and children.

So I was shocked when I read that a company called Teleflora, which is currently sponsoring an America's Favorite Mom contest for Mother's Day (Donnie and Marie Osmand will crown the winner on NBC's Primetime tomorrow night), categorized adoptive moms in their contest as "non-moms." An adoption blogger complained, and the company quickly realized their error. They've now change the category to "adopting moms" and issued an apology on their web page.

This weekend, I rented the Oscar-nominated film, Juno. It's easy to see why this little film generated such buzz. It's funny, smart, and heartwarming. It also brings up the perpetually relevant topic of teens, sex, unplanned pregnancy and the ever-contentious issue of "choice". As a mom, these are issues of great interest to me. As someone who has personally dealt with an unplanned pregnancy prior to marriage, it is also a subject dear to my heart.

After watching Juno, I came across an opinion piece in the Boston Globe about the film by Ellen Goodman, a well-known feminist writer. Goodman is critical of Juno and a "wave of movies about unexpectedly pregnant women - 'Knocked Up', 'Waitress', and 'Bella' - all deciding to have their babies and all wrapped up in nice, neat bows". She expresses deep concern for the row of tweens sitting in front of her in the movie theater while she watches Juno. What misleading messages, she asks, are "being absorbed through their PG-13 pores"?

Goodman is certainly not alone in her thinking. Many adults, pundits and parents alike, expressed outrage at the recent announcement of 16 year-old television star, Jamie Lynn Spears' pregnancy. In a society that offers abstinence as an "option" for teens and follows up with information about "safe sex", the parental fury over Jamie Lynn is presumably about her carelessness and ultimately, her decision to keep her baby - not her sexually active status. And understandably, no one wants to see a teenage girl go through the stigma of pregnancy, the pain of giving up a child, or the hardships of raising a child when one is seemingly ill prepared.

When I first learned that I was pregnant, I was 27 and in the middle of a series of on-air live auditions for a seat on ABC's "The View". I knew that the producers were seeking a single 20-something and that my untimely pregnancy would likely cost me the job, no matter how well I performed. Moreover, the auditions (11 in total) were going to continue for several months due to the immense ratings boost they were providing the network; it would be nearly impossible to disguise my condition through the process. I made the difficult decision to publicly announce my pregnancy (on the show). Sean and I got married in a small ceremony a month and a half later in Arizona.

I was in a committed relationship, but I was not engaged when I learned of my pregnancy. Sean was still in law school and I was on the verge of launching a television-hosting career on the hottest daytime talk show. Professionally speaking, the timing couldn't have been worse. Plus, I was deeply aware of the embarrassment and disappointment this would cause my devout Catholic parents.

Of course, there are difficulties that one must endure in making any tough choice. Witness Juno waddling through the school hallway, missing out on prom, and enduring the stares of peers, the judgmental look of a school secretary and the insensitive comment of an ultra sound technician during one of her prenatal visits. Her wit, good humor, and steely exterior did little to dissipate the pain I felt for her during those scenes - a testament to the fine acting skills of this film's rising star.

I was not a teen, but I could certainly relate to the feelings of despair that drove Juno into the "Women Now" clinic. However, what Juno (and the women in the other movies) learn, is that life's problems always look their worst when they first present themselves. In those moments we are very susceptible to underestimating our own strength and the willingness and ability of others to help us through. But it is precisely when we are gripped by fear and self-doubt that courage counts most. The films and heroines that Ellen Goodman dismisses as "fantasy" all celebrate this little life secret, crumpled bow and all.

As I have come to learn for myself, an unplanned pregnancy and child often results in unplanned and unexpected joy - and not just for the mother. What Goodman and others, fail to grasp is that in order for that to happen, one must have faith, hope, and the unsullied optimism of a teenage girl to believe in such things.

Today's celebrity rumor wins points for the details. Thanks to an 'an insider', we know not only that Jennifer Aniston is preparing a nursery for her soon-to-be-adopted child, we also know when the child will arrive (December) and his name (Alexander). Pretty impressive insider information, I'd say.

The source says that the adoption is being handled through a Los Angeles-based agency and that Jen has spent $300,000 preparing the perfect nursery in her Beverly Hills mansion. The nursery includes a nanny's suite, a playroom and two children's bedrooms. The extra room is for the daughter she plans to adopt next. "She thinks having a boy first would be best, so he can look out for his sister", the insider said.

Maybe it is just the way she's been portrayed in the press, but to me Jennifer Aniston always looks sad. Maybe some children in her life would put a smile back on her face.

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Ah, the rumor mill--how it spins. Sources--and by sources, I mean our pal Perez Hilton, are starting to rumble that Madge, the Material Mom, is keen to add to her brood.

If any of this is to be believed, and it's hard to imagine given all the grief Madonna has faced over adopting her soon-to-be son David from Malawi, then she of the blond ambition is poised to adopt again. Her adoption of David is not yet complete, however, so I doubt she'll be entering those waters before leaving those she's waist deep in now.

Sources are saying Madge is looking to even out the testosterone by adopting a girl, this time from India. Madge is already mom to Lourdes, and Rocco as well as little David

A Florida woman is under lock and key for faking her pregnancy. The twenty-four year-old was supposed to be surrogating a child, and had collected nearly $6,000 for rent, medical bills and other assistance from two adoption agencies in other counties.

Shawanda Butler was found out after representatives from the Little Angels of America visited her home. She refused to show them her stomach and instead retreated to the bedroom where she allegedly stuffed her shirt with a pillow.

Butler is now facing fraud charges for allegedly faking her pregnancy to collect money from the adoption agencies.

Part of me wants to wave my fist at the injustices that we read about every day. Part of me just bats an eyelash knowing there's so much worse out there.

Critically acclaimed actress Emma Thompson has waged a legal battle to keep her adopted son from being deported. She and her husband, Greg Wise, "informally" adopted twenty-one year-old Tindyebwa Agaba, a Rwandan refugee, after meeting him at a Refugee Council party several years ago.

Now the British government may be sending Tindyebwa back to Rwanda. According to the government he has no legal right to stay in the U.K. Agaba was orphaned after his family was reportedly killed in 1994. Agaba was allowed to stay in the U.K. for five years as an asylum seeker.

I'm not sure what it means to informally adopt someone and if a more formal adoption process would have given Emma, her family and her son more rights for him to stay in the country. Agaba has been in the U.K. since 2003 and is now attending Exeter. It seems a shame that he should have to go back to Rwanda if he is happy with his family here.

My husband and I managed a date this weekend (yay!) and went to see Juno. I'd heard a lot of good things about this movie, which tells the story of a quirky teenage girl who becomes pregnant and decides to give her baby up for adoption. It did not disappoint. I laughed, I cried, and while I left the theater entertained, there was enough substance to the film to have thoughtful discussion over dinner. (And thank goodness, because otherwise we might have had to talk about the kids!)

It surprised me a little to find this article in the Chicago Tribune that characterizes the reaction of birth parents to this movie. Many are cautioning that the teen pregnancy comedy paints too rosy a picture of the decision to place a baby up for adoption. "['Juno'] gives the impression that one can hand a baby off to strangers, have a few tears at the time the baby is born, and then the next day get on with your life as if nothing happened. That is of great, great concern to me," says Mirah Riben, a board member at Origins-USA, a national organization for birth mothers.

Other women interviewed called the movie "oversimplified," "insulting," "painful," and "not true to life."

I understand where they are coming from, I really do. The character Juno has a cavalier attitude towards her decision-making in regards to her pregnancy. She walks away from the abortion clinic because she obsesses about the fact that the baby has fingernails. She chooses the adoptive couple out of a newspaper ad. She signs legal paperwork without flinching, and without any apparent involvement of her own lawyer or an adoption agency.

However, the bottom line for me is that Juno is a COMEDY. It's FICTION. If the movie were touted as an accurate portrayal of the heart-wrenching decision to place a child for adoption, it would be a documentary. (It would also be MUCH less popular.)

Anyone else who has seen this movie want to weigh in?